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Archive for June, 2006

I’ve just remembered…

… about Postsecret. You probably know what that site’s about already and if not just go and visit it now or else you’ll just end up reading about the fact that I’m threatening to buy a white trouser suit (more later). Anyway — about Post Secret — it was one of a gargantuan number of sites I had on my ‘favourites’ list on my old computer until it finally crashed and died, taking every single bit of data with it to Computer Heaven. I had, of course, saved nothing (‘saved’? What’s ‘saved’? ’tis a strange concept to the likes of I…).

I’ve slowly built up my favourites list again and every now and then another site name resurfaces in my befuddled brain and it’s like becoming re-aquainted with an old friend. I also recently remembered Lilek’s Bleat  and the J-walk blog  — Lileks’s a good writer and the J-walk Blog is full of weird links.

The white trouser suit is one of a number of things I’m thinking of trying — mainly because I don’t want to get stuck in a rut clothes-wise but also because I’ve recently realised that my entire wardrobe consists mainly of black. This whole Sicilian grandmother thing was purely accidental (I think I was just being lazy and playing safe) but I’m going to stop it now and have a search for a white trouser-suit (think Bianca Jagger — not Liz Hurley). Perfect for summer weddings (not that anyone’s invited me to one, but still. And it would have to be off-white — so as not to eclipse the Bride). Also pretty-darn-impressive for dressy-up type Parent’s evenings  — but probably not quite right, huh? Parent’s evening make me nervous as hell but I’ll tell you about that some other time…

Another thing that I’ve just discovered is Bloglines — why did I not know about it before and why did you not think of telling me?  Seemingly, even an inebriated halfwit would have no problem working out how to use Bloglines. So it was for research purposes only that I checked out the guide to using Bloglines (somewhere) on Preetam’s site. I say ‘somewhere’ because the URL is about a mile long and I can’t make automatic links here — if someone can tell me how that is done I’ll be grateful for ever more and will almost definitely put a link to your site and then you’ll have up to two more visitors every few months.

I’ve had to edit this post three times so far because I realised I misspelled ‘gargantuan’. I don’t know if it’s right yet or even if there is such a word. It just came into my head. Is there such a word?

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A total waste of £2.99 — I could just about have bought a copy of Principles of Economics for that and bored myself to sleep. Or I could have had another attempt at reading the so-called information pack I got from the Customs and Excise sadists people but the risk of suicide was too great. I should have stuck to downing a couple of Nytol but I thought I was getting addicted to the things. I should have known that anything with the word 'herbal' in it would have no effect on me — I've just no faith in anything that doesn't have a good dose of man-made chemicals in it.

It's the same with health food shops. I've tried them in the past but there's never anything in them that I'd actually want to eat and all the assistants look washed-out and knackered (probably due to the lack of chemicals). It could also be because of all the beans and pulses they eat and their need to concentrate on controlling the resulting excess flatulence. This is why they hardly crack a smile and why I never eat beans.

And talking of 'things of the bottom' have you noticed a trend amougst some bloggers to publish an inordinate number of posts on that very subject? Dooce is always at it. And, even worse, she and a number of others don't just write about their own lavatorial habits but give us a detailed account of their offspring's back-end activities. Talk about an invasion of privacy — it's just about guaranteed that a least one of these parents will be sued or disowned at some point in the future.

Right — it's now 4.36am. Sleep or no sleep, I'm off to bed.

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Business

I have not been here. I have been busy with Business. I think I'll use here as an escape from Business. The launch is only weeks away. I eat, sleep and live it every second of the day. It's like a new, delicate, but demanding baby.

I'm now going to write about Big Brother and you can't stop me (I know I said I think about Business every second of the day but I was exaggerating). I have lost my innocence because of Big Brother (just incase you think I mean government intrusion and monitoring of the lives of everyday citizens — I'm not — it's the UK reality TV show that I'm on about). Lying, cheating, backstabbing, continuous bitching. I'm losing my faith in human nature. And I KNOW IT'S ONLY A GAME SHOW — but now I'm thinking that's how people are in 'real life', only I never knew it before. I don't think I'll ever trust anyone again: all nicey, nicey to your face, then ripping the hell out of you behind your back. Bastards.

I'll especially watch out for anyone who calls me 'Babe'. That's a sure sign that behind your back they're telling anyone who'll listen that you are a slapper/has-been, moose, arselicker. I now believe that I've been (unjustly) called all those things on countless occasions over the years, by people I liked and by people I thought liked me. And not one of them had the nerve to say it to my face. Gutless bastards.

Just watch your backs, thats all.

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Dying beautiful

200px-Monroe-1.jpg The incomparable Marilyn Monroe. Born on this day, 80 years ago.

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